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Friday, August 22, 2014

Friday's Faith, Freedom, Firearms, Flatulence and Football

Welcome to the end of yet another exciting, action packed week  here in the blogosphere and yes, there are still a bunch of you hanging out, chatting it up with your resident 400lb Gorilla of Oklahoma media.  And for that, I thank you.  Let's see what the hell is going on in this crazy, silly, madcap world in which we live...

Harder, Faster, Longer
Amazing art by Jason Coates
I've had a few inquiries as to the new nature of the blog and some of my ongoing commentary in social media - that I've become more aggressive, harder and less tolerant. Um, yeah.  I have.  I've been wrestling with some of these health issues and it gets frustrating and I've stared my own mortality in the face and it really pisses me off.  I'm not old enough to be going through some of this crap but since I am, I'm not going to waste any time - I'm cutting to the chase and if y'all don't like it, there are other tepid, feed-you-want-you-want-to-hear blogs and news services out there that will tickle your ears and put your intellect and emotional well being to sleep.  Have fun with that.  Meanwhile, the rest of us will be over here, shaking the trees and taking folks out of their comfort zone. 

I'm back.  I'm pissed off.  I'm tired.  I'm restless and most of all, I've reached that point of complete saturation wherein the status quo is bothersome and an insult to our intelligence.  Let's fight back.  Let's call it like it is, damn the consequence.

Football Fistfights
When I played ball in high school, our coach and the coaching staff always told us that no matter where we are, we are ambassadors of our school and that should be taken into consideration.  We can be as mean and nasty on the field of battle as we choose, but we are to be gentle as doves off the field.  For some reason, that is beyond some people today.  The Stoops organization at OU can't seem to control his people because once a year at least, we hear of some football player getting into an altercation with someone - but this time, it was a woman.  A football player beat the shit out of a woman in public.  Really?  What the hell is wrong with Stoops and why is the rest of the team not whipping this young man's ass?  It's all about the cash flow, no doubt, but good heavens.  A ball player beats the shit out of a woman at a bar and the guy still has teeth in his mouth and law enforcement will take their sweet time prosecuting this pampered punk as a result.  The cure?  Double tap center mass - learn to defend yourselves, ladies and do so with lethal force.  Clean out the gene pool.   Boomer Sooner, y'all. 

Some Encouragement
This weekend, I challenge you to do something you probably haven't in a long time.  Take yourself out to see a local band.  Go enjoy a few adult beverages, listen to some local artists do their thing.  If you're a musician reading this, you know how many hours and hours you put into working a set list, creating a few hours of entertainment and it is amazing to see people have a great time with you.  So, friends, go enjoy some local talent.

Be safe. 

Gorilla

Thursday, August 21, 2014

Stupid Freaking Laws, Regulations & Stuff

There is so much about the great state of Oklahoma that I care for, it's saddening to see the place be overrun with dumbass laws and lawmakers trying to create more and more dumbass laws.  Of course, many of the lawmakers ARE dumbasses, so we shouldn't be too surprised.  Let's take a trip down Dumbass Lane and see what we find, shall we?

Tougher Divorce?  Really?
One lawmaker decided that she should make it tougher for individuals to get divorced and that would somehow create a godly marriage utopia wherein we will all live happily ever after and Jesus would smile upon us.  Yeah.  It's just that stupid.  If they want to get serious about the divorce rate, how about make it tougher to GET married.  One of the reasons that people get divorced these days is because they have no freaking clue whatsoever they were getting themselves into.  The Church has so idolized the institution of marriage that it is in the minds of some to be a Holy Grail of our existence, a pinnacle to be reached beyond all other goals and desires of the human existence.  So, they go in blindly, thinking that all will be wonderful and the heavens will open up and they will be fulfilling the will of God.  You see how stupid this is?  If we are serious about the divorce rate, we'll make it tougher to get married.  Period.  Everything else is just poppycock.

Weed It Out
Alcohol and tobacco are legal in the state of Oklahoma and the state coffers are kept pretty damned full from the purchase of said products.  One former legislator who was instrumental in seeing an increase in the taxes on tobacco products argued that tobacco is just so horrible for us, but when asked why he didn't author legislation to ban the products, he laughed because the state needs that money to pay his and other useless piles of dung who are elected officials.  So, we see ourselves filling the coffers with alcohol and tobacco...and we know that both substances are killing Oklahomans...but it's still illegal to smoke weed in the state of Oklahoma.  That, my friends, is about as dumbass as it comes. 

ISIS Must Be Destroyed
Not being a fan of preemptive war, I think the time has come to send an exceptionally strong message to the scumbag pieces of crap in the Middle East who have dubbed themselves "ISIS."  Their behavior a radical Islamists is bad enough, and now, they are taking it to a new level and we had damned well better respond and do so with fierce vengeance.  The solution is relatively simple:  We use our SOGs to surgically remove them from the planet.  To hell with the Geneva Convention, the time to change the rules of engagement are now.  No more beheadings.  No more acts of terrorism.  We need to send our SEALs or Rangers in to take care of business and wipe the earth clean of these vermin.  If we do not, we're sending a message that we're a bunch of sissified big talkers.  And before you start thinking my position is based on that of race, the last asshat to behead an innocent was/is a British citizen and I believe that he, like the rest of the terrorists, should be killed swiftly and painfully.  All who love and know him should weep and mourn his loss as we mourn the loss of our innocent brothers and sisters.  It's time to send our SEALs in to kill these bastards.  Period.

Of course, these are just my opinions, and I could be wrong.  But I seriously doubt it.

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Pro-Life, Capital Punishment Conundrum

One of the most perplexing and mind-numbing conundrums in the conservative world is that of the pro-life hardline stance and the issue of capital punishment.  The argument for pro-lifers is that every life is sacred, every human being is created in the Imago Dei and therefore have a right to life.  I don't disagree with that one bit for I too have been pro-life for most of my life and for a good part of that, had no clue as to why I was pro-life.  I don't support abortion on demand, and I sure as hell don't think that taxpayer dollars should subsidize it either.

But I digress.

On the other hand, there's the issue of capital punishment where the perpetrators of horrendous crimes against humanity are put to death.  But does that life still have value?  Is that person still created and existing in the Imago Dei?  This is a conundrum I have wrestled with for a very long time.  Not an easy place intellectually or emotionally to find one's self, I admit.  These are the conclusions I have come to:

1.  If I to be pro-life, I must also be anti-capital punishment otherwise I am being intellectually dishonest.

2.  The issue of war/pacifism is a completely different argument for a different time,  for I believe there are "just wars." 

3.  Immediate justice wherein a perpetrator is caught in the act of a heinous crime and is put to death on the spot can be considered acceptable, but is also troublesome. 

4.  Rigid pro-lifers who are also rigid capital punishment proponents are idiots and clearly lack intellectual honesty.

Right or wrong, that is now my stance.  I'm not a pro-capital punishment kind of guy any longer.  There are exceptions to the rule, of course as stated in (3) above.  But even saying that, I feel a little dirty, someone dishonest myself. 

As I age and come face-to-face with the reality of my own mortality, these are questions I find myself compelled to answer.  It's not as though I'm picking a fight, desirous of some debate, but rather I feel my soul must be cleansed from these inconsistent suppositions. 

I've spent far too much time in the presence of blood thirsty individuals who believe that they can use the term, "justice" and be able to explain away their lust for revenge and judgment.  These same people permeate the fabric of our government and many more are clamoring to follow suit and join the ranks of elected officials.  They are everywhere and while they say they are caring, compassionate "Christian" men and women, I can assure you that they are merely ravenous wolves in sheep's clothing.

Don't be fooled, don't be misled about these arguments.  Think for yourself, do your homework and work it out for yourself.  I don't have all the answers - I'm just starting to ask the right questions.

Friday, August 15, 2014

Friday Watercooler Jibber Jabber

Friends, this has been an incredible week for news junkies and lovers of juicy rumors and even though the weekend approaches with all the fury and gusto of a teenage boy on prom night, there is still lots to watch and talk about.  Let's dive in, shall we?

Ferguson, MO - The community that just keeps on giving us news upon news.  The Reverend Jackson and Reverend Al Sharpton showed up to show their support, hand out business cards and no doubt recruit individuals on their crusades to save the masses through propaganda and fundraising.  The community of Ferguson is trying to get a grip on just how jacked up they are and frankly, the jury may be out for a while.  Riots, looting, peaceful protests and jack-booted thugs posing as law enforcement have all left their mark on the landscape of that community and this Gorilla thinks it will be a very, very long time before they recover.  The only way recovery can begin is for the police department to admit fault for killing an unarmed man.  Nothing else really matters except that cold, hard fact.  It's sad that the issues there have been diluted and turned into ridiculous sound byte moments.

Gorilla Confession:  For the last week, I've physically felt better than I have in quite some time and with the exception of a few rough moments of chest pains and digestive pain, it's been an overall good week.  I confess to you, my friends, that there are times when I feel so horrible that I want to bash in my own skull with a sledgehammer, but something always brings me back to reality and reminds me that I'm bigger than the pain, that I can use that pain and channel it elsewhere.  Life is tough sometimes and mine is no different.  One thing I have learned, however, is the true meaning of the saying that we are all created in the imago Dei (image of God) and should be respected for that reason alone.  I also confess that the pain coupled with a new medication regiment has made me more than just a little cranky at times.  In fact, it makes me so uncomfortable at times that I want to bite walls.  But, with the prayers and well wishes of y'all, I live to fight and blather on for yet another day.  Thank you.


Photo courtesy KGOU
Fallin/Dorman Thriller:  The saga continues for the two candidates running for Governor, one the well known and popular incumbent, the other a little known state representative from Rush Springs (home of the Watermelon Festival).  Joe Dorman is someone I consider a friend, a man with whom I've shared deer camp and cold beer over a camp fire.  He's a damned good man and yes, he'd make a very good governor of this great state.  That being said, I have people for whom I have an enormous amount of respect in the Fallin camp and they truly believe in what Governor Fallin has in mind for her office after reelection.  I've talked to the Governor personally quite a few times over the years and yes, she is a very charming and disarming individual and she hasn't really screwed anything up as Governor.  That, my friends, is the real litmus test in Oklahoma - whether or not you can just not screw anything up during your tenure.  All that being said, I have no pony in the race and wish only the best for both candidates.  Yeah...that's me hedging my bets.

From the "Get the hell out of here" file - By 2025 Sexbots will be commonplace:  I, for one, call bullsh*t on this one.  The story is sensational to be sure, and is rather emblematic of our cultural inability to be intimate with one another in a real way that transcends merely the exchange of bodily fluids.  Some may believe the answer is robot sex partners, I am not one of them.  Read the whole incredible, borderline sickening story here.

Well kids, that's it for now.  Have a safe and sane weekend.